Admiring the awards (abandoned)

[james potter]

James walked through the doors to one of his favorite rooms at Hogwarts. In his opinion it was too often overlooked by students. By Filch too it seemed, as a thin layer of dust coated many of the trophies near the door. The man must be getting more creative with his detentions. James smirked. Come to think of it, it was pretty amazing he hadn't grown to dislike this room, with all the times he'd been ordered to clean it. But the room had instead always held a great interest to James, he loved walking through the rows of trophies, inspecting the names.

His real appreciation for the room had begun after the fourth time he'd been ordered by Filch to clean the trophies. He'd been polishing away when suddenly right under his thumb was his father's name. James had felt immensely proud. Ever since then he couldn't wait until he had an opportunity to add his name to this hall, in the hopes his son would one day see it.

Pausing in his steps, he looked out the window and enjoyed seeing the sight of the other students outdoors. Reading by the lake, a group of friends practising quidditch. James was glad Hogwarts remained as close to safe harbor as could be found in these dangerous times. Lost in his thoughts, he continued looking out the window, thinking about how distant the trouble in the wizarding world really seemed.

[carson hale]

Carson sprinted through the halls, trying to get away from Peeves who seemed to choose this floor of the castle as his haunt for the hour. Pausing for a moment, she could no longer hear his echoing laughs but faint screams came from somewhere back the way she had came. She took this as a sign to mean she was temporarily safe from the pranking poltergeist. While she had been running, she hadn't cared where she was going so long as it was away from Peeves. Her eyes caught sight of the trophy room door. Now to most the somewhat dusty room held no appeal, but for Carson it was different.

She entered the room almost silently. Call her paranoid but she did not want to do anything that could attract the attention of a certain annoying ghost. The door had just clicked shut when she realized that she was not alone. Across the room looking out the window was the notorious James Potter. As he looked deep in thought, Carson figured it would be best to pretend he wasn't there. So instead of instigating a conversation, she walked over to the far shelf in the back-most wall of the room.

There, nudged halfway behind a larger trophy was a somewhat smallish plaque. It, unlike most of the trophies, was spot free. Ever since she had discovered her brother's plaque in her first year, she made a point to keep it clean. Nary a week went by when she didn't stop by to admire it and give it a thorough dusting. But unlike her previous visits, this time Carson could not talk to the spirit of her deceased older brother (the plaque). Overwhelmed by a sudden sadness, Carson gently sat the plaque down and turned to see what James was looking at.

"It all looks so peaceful doesn't it? You'd never guess from that happy image that there are bad things in the world, huh?" Her voice was just more than a whisper. From the corner of her eye, she glanced at his face to gage his reaction.

[james potter]

James turned, startled out of his own mind. A girl he recognized but didn't know was in the room now, he must have missed her entrance. He hoped he hadn't seemed rude, it wasn't often he got so lost in thought he missed what was happening around him. He grimaced, "My thoughts exactly." He tore his mind away from the unpleasant occurences he'd been contemplating and forced a smile onto his face. "You were awfully quiet," he said, "hiding from someone?" As an afterthought he added, "I'm James."

[carson hale]

It took all of her will power to fight off the laughter that threatened to consume her. She hadn't meant to startle James, she hadn't meant to speak at all for that matter. If only she could quit speaking before she thought things through, she wouldn't be in some of the situations she was in. Case point. Her lips quirked into a smile when James introduced himself. "Yes I know who you are. Heart-throb of Hogwarts yet so lovingly dedicated to pursuing Lily. How the girls swoon when you walk past, yet you only have eyes for her. I respect that, not many men have your will power James." Carson jokingly winked.

"I'm Carson." Her eyes darted back and forth before she leaned in. "My parents thought I was going to be a boy," she stage whispered. Carson stood back up straight, her eyes subtly went back to her brother's plaque. "You can call me Cari. Everyone does." Introduction aside, Cari laughed at how spot on James was for her presence in the trophy room.

Her blue eyes returned to where he stood, meeting his eyes. Her mother had always taught her to make eye contact when in conversation. "And yes, I am hiding. Apparently Peeves has taken it upon himself to 'play' with the students just down the corridor. Nothing against him, but I don't feel like being his victim today." Unfortunately, eye contact had never been a strong point for Carson so instead of looking at James, she looked around the room at all of the trophies lining the walls. "What about you? Is there some special reason you're here? You don't look like you're hiding." She turned back to him with an arched eyebrow.

[james potter]

James glowed inside when she described what she knew of him. At least she thought it was impressive, James wished Lily would see it that way. His smile became less forced as he was drawn more into the conversation and away from his thoughts. He laughed at her introduction and mirrored her sideways glance before putting a finger to his lips and mouthing, "Your secret is safe with me."

James laughed a bit when Cari said he'd apparently been right on her reason for being there. "Well, Peeves can tend to pile on past the point of 'all in good fun.'" He was impressed by the eye contact she'd given in right off the bat, that usually marked a trustworthy person or a very good liar, he'd come to know. He watched her look around at all the trophies, and he gave a grand wave at them, "All of these," he said. "Believe it or not, I grew rather fond of them after about the fifth time I was assigned to scrub them off." "And, of course, there's the view," he finished, with a vague wave at the window he'd been staring out of earlier, "Not a dark mark in sight."

[carson hale]

"Fifth?" Cari asked incredulously. "How many times have you had to scrub them for detention?" Her eyes carefully glanced over each trophy, there were so many! A spark of mischief entering her eye, Cari turned back to James. "Well, you must be slacking. The state of these trophies are atrocious! Just look at the dust!" She coached her voice to sound haughty and superior. A single second was all the time that she managed to keep up the facade before she cracked a wry smile. "You'll just have pull another prank so that they may have a proper dusting." She wouldn't lie. The pranks James and his posse pulled amused her and in times like these, the school sometimes needed a good laugh.

Looking to where he had vaguely waved, Cari saw the window she had caught him staring out of. "It is a good view." She admitted, even though it was a little sugar-coated for her liking. Then something that James had said struck her. Dark mark? Her eyes turned to look at him, trying to figure out what exactly he had meant. He looked all the part of a nonchalant teen, but as many say- looks can be deceiving. "You sound like you are familiar with the dark mark. No one familiar to you, I hope. As horrible as that may sound."

[james potter]

James grinned. "Oh, trust me," he said, "pranks have been pulled. Old Filchy is just getting slightly more creative with his detentions." It was true, somewhat, James thought. Though Filch hadn't fulfilled his dreams of shackling them up by their ankles, he had begun deciding other parts of the school besides the trophy room needed repair, like the dungeons. James grimaced at the all too recent memory of scrubbing the underside of the potions tables. The memory still brought a cramp to his neck, and he rubbed it forecfully.

Her next comment darkened his thoughts though, and he let it show as his brow furrowed. "No thankfully, my family's all alright. Doesn't really matter does it though?" he was speaking now to himself as much as her, "It's still someones family getting murdered. It's all the same to Voldemort." He'd been staring at the floor, but when he said the name he glanced quickly up at her to gage her reaction. It wasn't that James felt superior to other people who were afraid of the name, the whole concept just felt strange to him, and he'd never fallen out of the habit of using the dark wizard's actual name. "And you," he asked, worrying how callous he might sound, "has it touched you close to home yet?"

[carson hale]

"You know, I was going to ask about these new punishments Filch was giving you but after seeing that look on your face... Man I don't even want to know." Cari laughed as she watched him rub at his neck. It was odd, James didn't look to be in pain more like he was remembering a former pain in the neck. "So... these new pranks you've pulled. I must have missed them. Please tell me you got Snape in some way,shape, or form!" Her voice was calm but her eyes seemed to plead for the answer she wanted to hear. It occurred to her that her penchant for the torture of this particular Slytherin might seem uncalled for so she began to explain.

"I just can't stand him! He thinks he's so high and mighty because he's SOOO good at potions." Legs starting to ache, Cari walked over to a nearby table and sat down on it indian style. "I've heard some Slytherins talking. They say that he calls himself the half blood Prince." She angrily blew a loose curl from her eyes. "Next time he sneers at my potion I'll show him what I think of his royal pain in the butt," whispered instead of spoken, Cari looked up unsure if James had caught what she had just said.

Playing it cool, Cari was somewhat startled when James mentioned the name of the arising dark wizard. "I've heard rumors that you call Voldemort by his name, but I didn't think they were true." She took this moment of silence to study his face. There was something she couldn't identify playing in his eyes. "Whatever is bothering you, don't stress yourself about it." As she couldn't figure out what exactly he was thinking, Cari just smiled. "And no, Voldy hasn't hit close to home. The only person I really worry about is my brother and I like to think I would know if he were in danger. It's a twin thing, you know?"

"So, what did it for you? What made you call Voldemort by his name instead of He who must not be named or you know who?" She tilted her head to the side, looking at James in curiosity.

[james potter]

James' eyes darkened. Snape. But then again, what was a conversation about Voldemort without discussing those who would eagerly follow in his footsteps? At least his distaste for Snivellus seemed to be the norm in this company, unlike when he was with Lily. He jerked himself out of his mind just in time to hear her plans for Snape. While he approved, he'd heard the same rumours of the so called, "half-blood prince." He wondered why anyone who obviously cared about blood so much as Snape would play up their half-blood status. He hated to sound complimentary of Snivellus in any way, but he felt it was necessary here. "Just be careful," he said, looking Cari in the eye. "Snape has a lot of tricks up his sleeve. Dirty tricks." He tried to make it as plain as possible that by that he meant the dark arts. "By all means though, he could afford to be brought down a notch or two, we - the Marauders I mean - have clearly worked on that."

"Voldy?" James smiled, "You clearly don't worry too much about saying it yourself." He wondered why he didn't fear the name, as so many did, adults even. As he spoke, it was as if he was explaining it to himself too, "I think, I think it might be because he hasn't hit me yet. Personally, I mean. Maybe not, I can't ever imagine something happening that would make me scared to say a name." He ran his hand through his hair, as if turning a crank on his brain, "It's as if, as if out there," and he gestured hazardly towards the window again, "past our walls, past where we're safe, everyone is so worried, so caught up in defending. It's as if no one is taking the time, or, the initiative, to go after him. Voldemort. That's what it's all about isn't it? He has to be stopped, and everyone is waiting for someone else to do it."

[carson hale]

"Snape? Dangerous?" She had to hold back her laughter. But looking once at James, Cari sobered knew it must be true otherwise James wouldn't be warning her. "Alright. Though I can't say I won't punch him the next time he insults me, I can promise that I will be more subtle in making a mockery of him." Never before had Cari ever thought of how dangerous Snape could be but in a way James was right. It just wouldn't do to anger the person who would more than likely be Voldemort's future lap-dog, that would be just asking for an Unforgivable. Shaking off the sudden realization, Cari heard James talking about taking Snape down a notch or two. "Yes, I've seen your work. The things you and your friends do are very appropriate for Snape and very amusing for me. I just don't think he gets the hint. Especially about his hair!" Just the thought of Snape's hair made Cari want to gag.

When James began to explain why he didn't fear saying Voldemort's name, she marveled about how deep it was. No one had ever been able to clearly explain to her why or why not they had feared the name and yet here James was making more sense then most adults she had talked to. " I just don't see the point in fearing someone who is just as human as the rest of us. I mean, yes he has dark arts, magic, and some idiotic followers but by fearing his name we might as well bow out of this war right now. Can you imagine someone who feared his name having to face Voldemort in a duel? They'd probably pee their pants." Cari scoffed when she had finished her explanation.

"My sentiments exactly. By waiting, they are only letting Voldemort grow stronger and get more power. But who knows, maybe this is one of those pre-ordained by fate and things are supposed to progress like they are." She shrugged. Not that she believed in fate or anything but some excuse for the lack of offensive was better than nothing. "So, are you planning on joining the fight when you're 'old enough?' " Cari used air quotes to show exactly what she thought of not being able to fight yet.

[james potter]

"Old enough, yeah." James mimicked Cari's air quotes. "I dunno about calling Voldemort 'just as human as the rest of us' though," he said. "Sure, I know he isn't a god of anything, but I hesitate to call anyone who's done the things he has human." He ran a hand through his hair, trying to sort his next thoughts into words. "It's true fearing the name is silly, but at the same time at least it gives people some reminder how real the danger is. Most people probably should be terrified of facing him in a duel. I don't like to think saying the name makes me any better than those that won't, though. I don't think I have the right, since I'm for all purposes 'safe' here at Hogwarts. But, well, Dumbledore uses it." he shrugged, as if that was enough of an argument.

"As for myself, yeah, god forbid he's still around when I leave school, but I don't think I could live with myself if I didn't fight against him and what he stands for. Whether that means becoming an auror or what, I don't really know. Haven't planned that far ahead yet."

[carson hale]

"Yeah, me either. Fact of the matter is things change and what we want to be now may not be what we want or are in five years." Cari sighed looking down at her shoes. "I'd fight too, just so you know." She looked up and gave him a wry smile. "So," Cari paused briefly, "since we are safe and, according to the adults, too young to know of Voldemort's horrors how about a change of subject?" Hopping down from the table she sat on, Cari walked around the room examining the trophies.

"Do you know anyone here? Any familiar names or dates? Relatives?" She turned to look back at him. "My brother's in here- my older brother. I don't know what he did specifically but it was some kind of service to the school. He never got the chance to tell me what he did, only my father knows and merlin knows he's a chatter box." Cari rolled her eyes. Her father had barely said a word to her in years, he was that deep in his depression. "Do you have any trophies in here?" Her eyes lit up with curiosity. "That would be so awesome!"

[james potter]

James shook his head, laughing lightly, "No, not that I know of at least. I don't think the school keeps track of records regarding who got the most detentions." He looked over at the far wall towards where the school kept its quidditch trophies and records. Just thinking about the sport made him feel as happy and at home as if he was soaring over the pitch right now, quaffle in hand. He pointed towards the wall, "I'm hoping to get my name on one of these quidditch plaques one day," he said, then winked, "or several, if I have anything to say about it."

"As for your first question," he said, "My dad has one I found a while ago, but he's never mentioned it and I haven't gotten around to asking him yet." That was sort of the truth, thought James. He'd found his dad's trophy during his second year, more than awhile ago. At first he'd been brainstorming all night with Sirius as to what it could have been for. When he finally came home for the Christmas holidays that year and had a chance to ask his dad, he'd chickened out, worried that the true story couldn't possibly stand up against his imagined versions. "It's a shame you don't know what your brothers is for though," said James, turning his thoughts back to Carson, "maybe you could ask someone on the staff, if your dad can't tell you. Some of them have been here for awhile."

[carson hale]

"Such a shame. So many hours spent in detention and no recognition for your efforts. That's just wrong." Cari laughed lightly as she shook her head in mock disapproval. "Well, you'll have to beat me for it," she motioned to the trophies he was admiring. "Cause I plan on having my name over there so many times it'll make your head spin to look at it." The look on James' face, Cari knew, must have been mirrored on her own. If there was one thing in the world that Cari loved it was the feeling of flying through the air and crushing the opposing team with a few carefully hit bludgers. Call her violent but it was better than having to attend anger management. In the air all she had to worry about was keeping her team safe and scaring the other.

"You know, I had never thought of asking a professor about my brother's plaque." Her hand moved to her chin. "That's actually a really good idea." She couldn't believe she had never thought of that before. She's a Ravenclaw, A RAVENCLAW!!! She's not supposed to overlook simple solutions such as the one James had just offered. Perhaps she had been looking too deep into the solution to see the answer right in front of her. "You sure you aren't a Ravenclaw? I mean prankster and problem solver- they both take great intelligence." Cari half joked. How had Ravenclaw missed out on a brain such as his? Sometimes that sorting hat confused her.

[james potter]

"Oh don't worry, I will," James said, laughter in his eyes. He meant what he said though, even though he said it in a friendly way. He didn't plan on letting anyone stop him from winning the cup for Gryffindor this year. He knew Cari played beater from seeing her on the pitch, and while it was never wise to get on a beater's bad side, James had never met a bludger he couldn't outfly. Well, he ammended his thoughts, maybe one, but that was a long time ago, no matter how much his elbow ached in memory.

Her words resonated within James. It was true, he was a schemer, through and through. But somehow, he'd never felt as if he belonged anywhere other than Gryffindor. It was where his father had gone, and his father before him. Perhaps it had been because of how much he'd been thinking about Gryffindor, but the hat had barely touched his head it seemed, when it shouted it. Also, he'd never heard the voice others claimed to when being sorted.

He realised that it was actually a pretty big compliment however, coming from a Ravenclaw. Each house probably assumed it was the best, and its qualities were as well. He grinned at Cari, "Well, you're spot on with the great intelligence," he said, tapping his temple. "But there's even more courage inside here." And he rapped himself on his chest with his knuckles. Lily could complain all she wanted about bravado and arrogance, but that was how he truly felt, and any other good qualities, well, at least in James opinion, weren't worth very much without courage. Otherwise you'd never use them when it matters. He also felt that with the world headed the course it was right now, it would need wizards of great courage to pull it back to the right direction. He only hoped he could be one.